If you follow my Instagram, you know I began tracking macros and got a coach to help me through a bulk and a cut. (disclaimer: all of my thoughts on my bulk are still very positive like I mentioned in my YouTube video) Throughout this bulk though, I started to watch and follow tons of girls who did the same thing. I got obsessed with being like them in a way. Using the same brands, eating all the bro foods, etc. The bulk was so good for me in that I put on MUCH NEEDED healthy fat and muscle and learned not to fear bigger numbers on labels and on the scale. But, I began to not be myself. I saw all these fitness girls who posted countless selfies and used all the popular supplement brands. Eventually, I stopped posting a lot of food because I thought it wasn't what 'they' did. I stopped doing yoga and added meat totally back into my diet. With that being said, I do not want to cut out meat again but I just wasn't as cautious of where it was coming from or how often I was eating it. I felt that eating plant based meals wasn't the bodybuilding thing to do, so I didn't..even though I firmly believe adopting more plants into your diet rather than meat at every meal is a great thing to do. I also started ignoring artificial sweeteners and things of that sort just to fit in with the brands, even though I have never stood for that. Basically, I was giving up what I loved and believed in to meet a standard.
Truly I didn't even realize I had totally changed myself to be like 'other fitness girls' until just recently. When I realized that, I started to realize that I was also being consumed by macros. I thought it was some freeing way of being able to fit in certain foods, but that's just not the case for me. It keeps me from going out at times because I don't know the macros at restaurants. I have to constantly think about food again. I have to take out certain very healthy foods some days just because they don't fit my macros. I can't just freely cook,etc. (hence why I kind of stopped posting food pictures).
All that being said, I realized I wasn't living. I was trying to live exactly like someone else and not like ME. I was letting food control me again, just in a different way. I just want to eat. REAL FOOD. Not walden farms because it fits my macros better. I want to be balanced and just eat what I want when I'm hungry and fuel my body with all of the whole foods this amazing earth has to offer. I truly believe in eating whole foods and providing our bodies with the best. Not what has the best macros... I want to be an influence to girls that you don't have to track macros to be healthy. I'm honestly almost ashamed I fell into the trap for so long. I do believe still macros can be a good tool for a short amount of time to reach a goal, but as a lifestyle, NO WAY. I want to post pretty food, support brands who care about the ingredients in products, do yoga, eat some vegan meals, lift, and just do what I WANT TO DO. Not make my Instagram full of selfies and big industry brands to try and be someone else. (yes I realize that wasn't about macros but when the thoughts start coming...lol)
So, my plan?? Well, since I did get a coach, I'm going to finish out this cut on my macros, or at least try to. I may even end it shorter than it was meant to be. But right after, I WILL BE JUST EATING. I don't even want to call it intuitive eating, just dang eating. Like A NORMAL HUMAN. I want to eat more plant based meals, a spoonful of peanut butter when I want, a huge bowl of nana ice cream when I want, and just fuel my body with all the clean eats. I want to support companies I stand for, not just a company with a big following. I will continue lifting because I absolutely love it!!! But I want to add in yoga again as well. I don't have to conform to any standard and there is no reason for me to track every gram I eat into a silly app. So, yep, those are my thoughts. Real talk lol no filter in this one. And I am not hating on anyone's lifestyle. I'm making this switch for myself. And I hope to show people everywhere that the health industry has truly manipulated our minds and it's really a very simple task to be healthy.
I will keep you guys updated as I start this. I can't wait to just be ME, eat REAL FOOD, and LOVE LIFE. Thanks for reading babes. Comment below any thoughts as well as ideas for future blog posts.